A column about my favorite commentary subjects: unnecessary laziness and flashy brilliance.
Your weekly Transcendentalist Horoscope
Random yet oddly appropriate quotes from Henry David Thoreau’s Walden.
No HDT quote could possibly describe this game.
FCD vs. Los Angeles Posh-Doesn’t-Even-Care,-David
MMP Prediction: Totally wrong
Actual Result: Whatever
This was a character game. Nothing more, nothing less (hopefully). And we came up short on that front, big time. When Edson Buddle actually reaches his potential, you know something went terribly wrong.
Pescadito (semi-RIP) Man of the Match goes to Carlos Ruiz, for sitting on the bench all game Adrian Serioux. In a character match when you’re getting blown out, I’d rather a guy get red carded than taking the rest of the game off. The red card clearly was given in observance of this MLS rule:
IV. b. i. §. 63: Thou shalt not tackle his excellence, David Robert Joseph Beckham (OBE) of the Queen’s Realm of Leytonstone, England, by the ankle from behind. The penalty for such a tackle shalt be a red card if the tackle werest performed in the open field, or a penalty and mandatory observance of all Spice Girls concerts since 1994 if thou tackle werest made in the penalty area.
Thank God it wasn’t in the penalty area for Serioux’s sake. The scoreboard wouldn’t have noticed either way.
There was definitely some frustration in his foul, but I don’t think it was red card worthy though I can see why the ref might have. Serioux supposedly said “Welcome, baby, welcome” after tackling Becks, but hard tackles are part of the game. After reviewing the play about 5 times through the glory of TiVo, I think its clearly yellow card worthy, but not red card material unless US Soccer is directing its refs to act like Champions League refs. This would scare me, as that style of game management really cuts into the quality of the product.
If you were at the game in Sections 126 or 127 and were witness to the controversy, please write an email about this douche:
Because I really cannot put this game into organized prose, I offer the following Random Thoughts:
- Adrian, if you hadn’t been talking to like 5 blondes after the game, I would have bought you a drink, seriouxly.
- Steve Cronin is by far the worst starting goalkeeper I’ve ever seen in the top flight of any professional soccer league. Seriously. Remember, I’ve watched Tony Caig play at Gretna. I’ve watched Shaka Hislop play in Frisco. I watched Jens Lehmann this season at Arsenal. When Rupert Murdoch decides to bust out Fox Soccer Channel 19, I’m pretty confident the worst goalkeeper in the Estonian 1st Division (otherwise known as the Meistriliiga) will outperform Cronnin. Replace his hands with Mickey Mouse gloves and at least he’ll have an excuse for his butter fingers. This dude is terrible.
- El Pescadito (semi-RIP) almost got into a fight with Serioux. Why? Well I assume that’s what normally happens after revivals like this one:
- I didn’t really pay attention during the pre-season game, but Landycakes has lost at least 1/2 inch of hairline since his throat-slash moment:
- Dario Sala… nevermind.
- At this point, I’d rather face the Dynamo in the playoffs (if we get there) than the Galaxy.
and your Weekly Namesake Update
Sitting on the bench, in Frisco. How appropriately unnecessary he must feel.
Minutiae
It has been a roller coaster week for Glasgow Celtic. On Tuesday I was sick thinking of how Rangers could win the quadruple. This is an accomplishment held only by Celtic’s famous Lisbon Lions.
Luckily, on Wednesday, months worth of anti-football finally did not pay off for Rangers, who were beat by style, quality, and a load of natural gas money in the form of Zenit St. Petersburg.
My thoughts of Rangers fans was further confirmed by the fact that they created the largest civil disturbance in the UK since 2001 and could harm England’s World Cup bid.
Thinking that Tuesday was the lowest I could possibly go, Thursday proved that reality makes sporting matters seem petty. Former Celtic player, manager, head of youth development, and coach, Tommy Burns passed away after losing a battle with skin cancer. It takes a special person and a humble ego to return to a club that fired you to take up a lower position. Such was Tommy Burns’ love of the club.
Player, 1975-1989
Manager, 1994-1997
Coach, 2005-2008
Words cannot adequately describe what many people feel for this man, though plenty of people tried (1, 2, 3, 4, 5). Having never seen Tommy play in person, I’ll leave the words to fellow Toro, Nathan, who has:
Tommy was one of those players who never really got all the credit he deserved. I was surprised when I saw the interview with Gordon Strachan to see him balling his eyes out. I remember going to a Celtic vs Aberdeen game as a kid when Tommy Burns chopped down Strachan and was red carded - it was a pretty vicious tackle - Ian Scanlon started inciting the crowd to shout “OFF!”.. I think it’s safe to say that as players Strachan and Burns shared more than a few harsh words.. obviously that changed.
From the video linked above, it is clear that Gordon Strachan had found an incredible friend in Tommy Burns. After Celtic’s 3-2 victory against Rangers weeks earlier, Strachan quickly left the stadium to attend Burns’ home parish, St. Mary’s in Calton (appropriately enough, where Celtic was founded), for a prayer vigil.
On Saturday, Motherwell and its manager Mark McGhee, teammate of Tommy at Celtic and long-time friend, gave Tommy one last gift in the form of a 1-1 draw against Rangers, putting control of the SPL title back in Celtic’s hands.
Tommy Burns, age 51, 1956-2008
Equally tragic, earlier in the season, Phil O’Donnell, Motherwell captain and player for both Tommy Burns and Mark McGhee, suffered from a heart attack while on the pitch and passed away at the age of 35.
Loading ...
I missed the game and am not sure whether I should put myself through the torture of watching the recording.. but I’m sure curiosity will get the better of me. More than anything I just want to see Serioux’s tackle to see what all the fuss is about.
Still can’t believe looking at the match report that Buddle got a hatrick.. either the man attended some serious skills clinics in the last few days or something went seriously wrong for us.. I’m thinking the latter.
As for the fat twit with the emotional problems (pictured at the top of your post). I wasn’t at the game, but my email is on the way. The fact is that streamers are not going to hurt players, refs or other fans.. neither are they going to have any dramatic affect on the outcome of a particular play. But I will say this “HOME FIELD ADVANTAGE”.
I’ve commented on this before, the streamers are a waste of time. It just takes away from the game, especially when everyone is looking at all the trash on the field. home field advantage.. haha.. that really helped yesterday didn’t it?
Streamers or not, you can’t have security guards antagonizing fans. We threw the streamers–not at the players–but in the most empty part of the field, which is what brought him over to our section. He went from bad to worse _after_ we gave him our streamers. He wasn’t even in charge of our section, the guy who was admitted that the other dude was out of line.
He refused to give me his name after the match and when I asked who I could talk to, he rather bluntly told me I had no right to talk to his boss and that he had already reported the “incident”. His total lack of self-control made it pretty clear that his report to his boss definitely did not give the full story. Everyone in the first couple rows of 126 and 127 was shouting at him — not us — to lay off. He was furious that we had taken pictures (and supposedly video that I haven’t seen yet), which to me indicates he was well over the line.
He had an ax to grind and was determined to do so regardless of whether it antagonized fans who are just trying to support their team. As an event staffer, his job is to rise above the craziness and keep a calm head, that picture above clearly illustrates that he was in no way calm, cool, or collected.
At the very least he should be re-assigned to a different part of the stadium. If I was a security contractor and I knew what kind of basket-case of an employee I had, I would make sure his contract ran out, and quickly.
If they’re good enough for Don Garver, then why should PHP get worked up over it.
http://web.mlsnet.com/commissionerspeaks/
I had never thrown a streamer at a football game until I came to an MLS game.. but the way I see it, is that it’s a fun part of MLS and whether you like it or not, it has to some extent become part of it’s identity.. and I don’t think it will go away.
Yeah.. Your point is well taken. We have a real problem at this ground creating home field advantage, and it will take a lot more than streamers to do that..
I could tell from the last home game I attended that the fans were getting really worked up when Knano Smith scored.. they crunched their Nachos extra loudly!
I just emailed a complaint to the our customer service reps.
That was the most unprofessional display by a stadium employee I’ve ever seen.
I’ll cancel my season tickets if I ever see him there again.
I’ve got half a mind to write up the story and email it to Bob Sturm at The Ticket.
I wanna know what this tool’s name is.
I too will send an email later today. I can understand that once in a while it may get out of hand and a player will get mummified, however the way this guy reacted was also inappropriate. As for the video, not sure if anyone else has it. I took a few pictures but my video was no good.
On another note, as Natalia and I walked out to the parking lot, we encountered another incident. An angry fan (wearing FCD colors, car had NY plates) starts honking his horn frantically, gets out of his car & bangs on the window of the car in front of him for letting someone “cut in the line”. He then proceeds to walk over to the “cutter” kick his door in, and threaten to kick his a**. Everyone else calm & collected, the angry fan was taken away in handcuffs.
A 5 minute wait cost him a night in jail & a mark on his record…go figure.
Something was definitely wrong yesterday.
beyond phenomenal photo…part of me wants to feel sorry for this guy because he obviously has a low quality of life…then I remember that he ruined the experience of several of the teams supporters and I just want to jump on his massive stomach.
Ok.. So I did it.. I tortured myself and watched the game. The good news is that I survived and I still want to go to the game this weekend. Hopefully the team are doing this too.. perhaps certain individuals will have their eyelids taped open and forced to watch the video several times, and upon doing so will muster the character that I know these guys can play with. There were really very few individuals who actually gave 100% for 90mins. Ok.. maybe one and that IMHO that was KC jr, but even he won’t be totally off the hook from this week’s video torture - he had several good chances that he knows he could have put away.
Nice write up the way.. and you are right.. amazing at it seems.. Landy has lost at least another inch of hair..
As far as the red card goes - under normal circumstances it could have gone either way, but given that he took out the six million dollar man of the MLS, I expected nothing less. The only thing that surprised me was the speed at which the red card was produced - it was out of his pocket and in the air before he even reached Serioux.. which leads me to conclude that the ref has committed IV. b. i. §. 63: to memory.
Bye Bye Morrow…
If the ref had waited a couple seconds I would have thought that maybe the red card was for both the tackle and the smack talking. As it was, the red was out of the ref’s pocket before Serioux even stood up.
Maybe there was some jarring between them before that the ref thought led to the tackle?
Regardless, Fat Albert Pires should have been shown a yellow for launching Odoro. Giving a very soft yellow on Bobby Rhine during his first minute in the game, then not giving one to Pires, then giving Serioux a very quick red indicates to me that the ref was taking the scoreboard into account. Being down in a game like that causes frustration, certainly, but you can’t then proceed to referee the game differently to each team just because you feel frustration caused the behavior to be more intentional.
walterb — ouch, just saw the news
http://images.google.com/images?hl=en&q=%22josh%20mostel%22&um=1&ie=UTF-8&sa=N&tab=wi
Is this our security guard?
I actually think that Bobby’s tackle was a yellow.. it was studs up.. but Ugly fat boy got away with murder.. that was a second yellow/red and Gullit knew it..(reason he subbed him out immediately following the incident). Boy.. is that guy ugly though - John Merrick’s long lost Brazilian cousin. I’d love to give him a quick reprisal of “who ate all the pies?”.
I would have done a shit lookalike for Pires, but I didn’t have a good picture. I poked around last night and determined the one I had was a lot better than I thought it was (mainly b/c I found a perfect picture to place alongside it).
[...] Todd Spiker wrote an interesting post today onHere’s a quick excerptAfter reviewing the play about 5 times through the glory of TiVo, I think its clearly yellow card worthy, but not red card material unless US Soccer is directing its refs to act like Champions League refs. This would scare me, … [...]
Hello. And Bye.
dude you know what I’m talking about! soy desole